Rachel’s life

Tonight is a night I don’t think I will forget..

I was at my house making dinner. Mark came over, we had a good evening together. As he was getting ready to leave I decided to ask him if he like me a lot or a bit? So I asked if he had put some thought into a converstion we had a month ago, he said slowly, yes you always seem to want to talk about this on the wrong nights.. Then he confessed that he doesn’t think he likes me more than casual dating. I realized that Mark is never going to like me in the way that I want, so I said well I think we need to break up. We talked for a while after that and it was good. Around 10:30 I told him he needed to go, I wanted to go to sleep. We hugged, as we did I wondered would this be a choice I will regret?  Yes, Mark is stunning and I am sure I will be stunned the next time I see him and wonder why I let something so great go…  No, I will still be happy life goes on. I have things to look forward to. Awesome roommies, a new job. I am starting a new chapter in my life; because my life is a storybook! 

The night was over he went home, I came to blog.

Sunday (Mothers day) when we talked to our mom for mothers day she let us know that dad was in the hospital and he wasn’t doing well. Around 9 we got the phone call on exactly what was happening, the tumor in my dad’s stomach had grown it was blocking his intestine so he couldn’t digest; therefore, he was throwing everything he ate and drank up. After hearing that I got a strong impression to go home work didn’t matter I needed to be home at this time. I talked to Sarah and let her know what I was going to come home, Jp was planning on coming home Tuesday.

Monday, Sarah and I left for our journey I drive the speed limit and under (safer and better gas mileage). We got to Delta around 8, we went straight to the hospital. Dad was looking good we spent some time chatting with him. I got to spend the night with him, every time he would hiccup I was ready with a bag for him to throw up. It was a long night, but a good night for me to see what my dad had been going through and my mom.

Tuesday morning I read to him from the Book of Mormon. After I read the chapter he bore his testimony, then I read the Little Prince to him. We got a handful of chapters into it before my mom come. I went home to do a few things and get ready for the day. I started to help mow the lawn, and cousins and aunts and uncles came over, we all went to the hospital and visited with dad. He was very tired and didn’t really talk just thanked everyone for coming and went back to sleep. Tuesday night we brought him home, I started to put ginger ale on his ice chips.. He liked that.

Wednesday morning first thing he asked me was to go sneak him some ginger ale for him to drink, so I did it, my mom didn’t love the idea at first then she realized that if he wanted it let him have it and I was. Wednesday he seemed to be doing ok, I was thinking he had at least two more weeks.

Thursday came he didn’t talk and he couldn’t walk. He expressed to Jp that he was going to try to make it to mom’s birthday so that she could collect his social security money because he thought she needed to be 60. The boys did research and found out that he didn’t need to be 60 things would be fine. So that night when everyone was at home Spencer, Phil and Jp gave dad a blessing letting him know mom would be fine and be taken care of..

Friday morning at 7 Spencer came and told me that dad had just passed away. We all chatting in his room for a long time. Thank goodness mom got a tramp for her mothers day, to keep the kids happy. We called Wendy(the nurse) and let her know, she called Dr Jackson. They both came by, then the Nickles came by and took his body. Before lunch Lily goes to the room he was in and comes back out and say’s did Grandpa already die? We told her yes.. It was a mellow day I ate lunch out side with Oscar and Kenzie as we were eating Kenzie decided to let me know that grandpa and died and gone to Heaven and was know with Jesus Christ. That was a good reminder that he was in a better place and much happier, no more pain… Even thought it is hard for me, I know that I will see him again and it will be a joyous reunion when that happens. And that he is with his mom and dad and his son Benjamin Jacob. The rest of the time has gone so quickly I cannot believe that I am going home Saturday what will my mom do after we all leave? I guess we will have to call and check up on her, often.

Friday night Mark and I went camping with my ward. I made tinfoil dinners, they turned out good a little burnt. When we got to the campsite everyone was very friendly to both of as. After we had been there about 30 minutes someone asked us how long we had been dating, Mark told them around 3 months. The conversation ended and pretty much no one else talked to us the rest of the night. It was interesting to see how I eat and how everyone else was eating I had done a lot of thinking about snacks and things to have, I had cliff bars and carrots and black and red panda licorice; everyone else had marshmallows, starburts, and other treats. I told Mark that I was sorry for not having better treats he laughed and said that he would much rather have what I had packed because in about an hour they weren’t going to feel the best after eating all the treats. After we ate and they did the wards getting to know each other Mark and I went to his car and listened to music. It was fun, I got to see a different side of Mark that night. He does enjoy his sleep and if he isn’t comfortable, he wants to go home.. hahah! The next day we did some exploring and found a handful of lizards. At breakfast I didn’t want bacon or sausage and one of the Bishopric members wife said that should be a decision make right there. Mark just laughed and said I already knew about her eating habits.

We went home and for a few hours did our own things, then we went swimming at his pool. We were exciting reading our books while getting a little sun. Mark and Bryan got to the pool before I did and some girls were already swimming, they were talking to them asking the boys age Mark said he was 12 and one girl said you don’t look like your 12, he said how old do you think I am? She said 22(he is 26), and he said ok we 22, how old are you? The girls said 21. I am pretty sure they were 14 at the oldest. I am grateful Mark didn’t dump me after I got to the pool for the, haha.. We ended up taking a dip in the pool and while we were swimming we saw a dead bird in his pool. DISGUSTING!

Mark finally agreed to let me wax his chest for him. After the first rip he expressed that he thought I was going to rip of his nipple, we laughed the rest of the rips were not that bad. And later he did comment about liking the smoothness. Later that night he did say that he liked it and was glad he did it.

Then I babysat and JP and MA’s. It was fun I got to watch The Office and Law and Order. After Mark and I watched Sweeney Todd, we didn’t like that at all, but it was nice to get some time together, before I took of to Utah the next Monday!

I was working out at the gym yesterday and something it said in the shape magazine or biking magazine is that when we are going become healthier we need to let people know. It hit me on my birthday when pretty much everything that I got involved food/treats. Now I am letting people know that I don’t only think about food. I like other things too. I haven’t had a chance to talk about Disney land it was so fun! I got to spend lots of time with the kids and Marlene and Phil. It really was a blast. I am grateful they invited me and helped me get out there. Wednesday morning we went to dinner with all the princesses, it might have rubbed off a little to much on me. When Mark dropped me off at home I always call him cowboy(cause he thinks he is one) and he called me partner, I stopped him and I said actually I would like to be called princesses. haha he looked so surprised.. But now when he text me he called me princesses occasionally, I think he is actually making fun of me. But it’s pretty funny!

As for my birthday it was a great day. I watched two episodes of the office went to lunch with some close friends. Mark took me to dinner at a Thia restaurant. It was really good. Then we went to a party that was fun, I only hung out with a few select people, but I enjoyed it. Saturday I went slip and sliding!! That was a blast. Sunday dinner and Jp and Ma’s, always fun, the funnest thing JP asked Max if he wanted to watch tv and he got so excited said yo gabba and did a circle and danced.. It was so cute. Anyways dinner was great I loved spending time with everyone here.

I just thought I would let everyone know, I got the job at state farm, it’s full time so that is great! We’ll I am off to the gym. I don’t want to be the one out of shape at the family reunion! I cannot wait to see everyone!!